Satire: NCAA Investigates Why It Wasn’t Making Millions Off College Admissions Scandal
Posted Mar 18, 2019
The NCAA announced Monday the launch of an investigation into why it wasn’t making millions off of the recent college admissions controversy. “After the disturbing revelations that massive bribes were being paid out to people other than us, we’re launching an immediate inquiry into how we possibly missed out on this,” said NCAA president Mark Emmert.
(The Onion)
Related: Other News
2026 SEC football predictions: Game-by-game picks, projecting every team's final win-loss recordThis year's race starts with familiar powers such as Georgia and Texas, but don't overlook programs like LSU, Oklahoma and Alabama. The SEC is once...
Tue Jul 14, 2026Texas Tech basketball star JT Toppin set to return for 2026-27 season amid ACL recovery
Texas Tech is receiving a major boost for the future of their basketball program. On Wednesday, the Red Raiders all but confirmed All-American forward JT...
Mon Jul 13, 2026
2026 MLB Draft: Pick results and analysis
20. Boston Red Sox: Jake Schaffner, SS, UNC. Draft ranking: 51. The first major surprise of this draft, Schaffner was projected as the No. 52...
Mon Jul 13, 2026
2026 Big Ten football predictions: Game-by-game picks, projecting every team's final win-loss record
College football defending national champion Indiana has become the league's latest standard-bearer, Ohio State reloads with championship expectations once again, and Oregon boasts one of...
Mon Jul 13, 2026